Cov neeg laus txog menyuam yaus. Ntu 3

2024 Tus sau: Seth Attwood | [email protected]. Kawg hloov kho: 2023-12-16 16:06

Ntu 1

Ntu 2

Peb txuas ntxiv tshaj tawm cov txheej txheem, txheej txheem, thiab lwm yam. kev sib raug zoo ntawm ib tug neeg laus nrog ib tug me nyuam. Lawv haum rau cov menyuam yaus txog 7-12 xyoo.

Tswv yim los yog dag 3 "Bargaining"

Nws tshwm sim hais tias tus me nyuam tau naughty (piv txwv li, tsis xav muab cov khoom ua si los yog ib yam dab tsi zoo li tshwm sim) thiab tsis mloog lus lossis txawm tias tsis zoo, thiab cov txheej txheem "Switching attention" (saib qhov teeb meem dhau los) tsis haum rau kev siv.. Cov txheej txheem "Ua li kuv ua" kuj tsis haum. Thiab tam sim no qee zaum txiv los yog niam tshem tag nrho cov khoom ua si rau nws, thiab tus menyuam tsis tau txais kev paub "zoo" = stereotype. Ntawd yog, yog tias koj me ntsis capricious los yog tsis mloog lus, ces cov niam txiv lawv tus kheej yuav tshem tawm txhua yam. Cov cwj pwm coj cwj pwm no tuaj yeem cuam tshuam ntau hauv lub neej (thiab qee zaum pab L, nyob ntawm seb txoj kev loj hlob ntawm tus neeg xaiv - sab laug lossis sab xis).

Koj tuaj yeem siv cov txheej txheem "Bargaining".(rau cov neeg uas tsis nyiam lub npe, koj tuaj yeem hu nws txawv, tab sis lub ntsiab lus ntawm qhov no yuav tsis hloov ntau).

Lub tswv yim yog yooj yim - yog tias koj ua li ntawd, ces kuv yuav: Kuv yuav ua ib yam dab tsi los yog kuv yuav tsis ua ib yam dab tsi. Ntau yam nyob ntawm lub siab lub ntsws uas koj siv. Raws li kuv qhov kev faib tawm, lub suab muaj xws li: intonation, ceev ntawm kev hais lus, timbre ntawm lub suab, qhia lub qhov muag, lub ntsej muag, gestures, lub cev txoj hauj lwm nyob rau hauv qhov chaw, i.e. posture, thiab lwm yam. (uas yog, tag nrho cov tsis hais lus tshwm sim, raws li psychologists hais). Rau kev nkag siab yooj yim, kuv conditionally faib cov tones raws li hauv qab no:

SIJ HAWM NTAWM EMOTIONAL TONES

KEV HLUB	- Kev xav siab, intonationally hnyav, nrog nce ntim, nrog kev ceev nrawm ntawm kev hais lus, lub suab nrov, nrog ntau dua lossis tsawg dua qhov hnyav, uas feem ntau ua rau cov lus qhia loj (thiab txawm tias kev thab plaub) rau tag nrho blunders, tsis ncaj ncees rau ib yam dab tsi, pom tseeb tsis quav ntsej txog dab tsi - lossis kev cai, thiab lwm yam. Ib qho kev xaiv tsis tsim nyog rau tus menyuam, hauv qhov tshwj xeeb nws tuaj yeem siv tau tom qab (los ntawm 18) hnub nyoog.
KEV NTSEEG	-Emotionally sublime (igniting = koom nrog), intonationally passionate tone nrog ib tug nruab nrab los yog siab ceev ntawm kev hais lus, nrog heev cus ciav qhib gestures, posture, lub ntsej muag, feem ntau txaus siab rau qhov zoo tshaj plaws zoo, kev xav, peev xwm ntawm tib neeg, thiab koom nyob rau hauv ib co ntawm lawv. txheej txheem los yog kev tshoov siab rau ib yam dab tsi: kev ua tiav tshiab, kev ua haujlwm nyuaj, kev kov yeej, kev ua tiav, thiab lwm yam. Haum rau kev ua haujlwm nrog menyuam yaus, vim tias cov menyuam yaus yooj yim heev thiab koom nrog sai.
Hlau	- Kev xav txias, intonationally indifferent, nyob deb ntawm qhov deb, tej zaum txawm tias qee qhov khav theeb, lub suab qis nrog tus nqi hais lus qis, nrog tsawg thiab kaw gestures (thiab posture) los yog tsis muaj, leej twg yuav nkag siab tias kev sib raug zoo yuav xaus - thiab qhov no yog qhov ceeb toom kawg, thiab nws yog lub sijhawm los kos cov lus xaus sai, lossis kev sib raug zoo tau xaus lawm - thiab koj yuav tsum "sau khoom." Lub suab no tsis haum rau kev ua haujlwm nrog menyuam yaus.
AV	-Sau siab, khov kho, intonationally ntseeg siab lub suab nrog qhov nruab nrab ntawm kev hais lus thiab lub suab nrov, nrog rau nruab nrab, txwv tsis pub (ntau kaw lossis hloov) ua haujlwm, ua haujlwm rau kev teeb tsa, qhia meej cov lus nug tsis meej thiab lwm yam kev cob qhia, tuav cov rooj sib tham, "debriefing", edification, tshaj tawm txog kev nplua, thiab lwm yam. Haum rau kev ua haujlwm nrog menyuam yaus, tshwj xeeb tshaj yog thaum nws sim tsis mloog lus, ua si pranks, thiab lwm yam.
NTAU	- Kev xav mos, qee zaum intonationally sincere, siab siab, tsis tshua muaj suab nrov, ntsiag to nrog qhib (los ntawm lub plawv), tuav tes taw, ua kom luv luv, haum rau kev tawm tswv yim mos lossis txhawb nqa ib tus neeg rau ib yam dab tsi, ntxias nws kom cuam tshuam nws, piav qhia qee yam. rau nws, thov kom lub siab xav los yog nws cov yam ntxwv zoo tshaj plaws,los yog ntxiv dag zog rau nws txoj kev ntseeg ntawm nws tus kheej, kev cob qhia, thiab lwm yam. Haum rau kev ua haujlwm nrog menyuam yaus.
AIR	-Emotionally light, relaxed tone with change volume and speed of speech, and intonation, with the same easy and more or less active open gestures, haum rau kev sib txuas lus nyob qhov twg, muaj kev lom zem, so so ua ke, ua si, thiab lwm yam. Haum rau kev ua haujlwm nrog menyuam yaus.
Dej	- Kev hloov siab los yog, zoo li nws yog, maj mam ntws ncig, ua kom deb ntawm qhov xwm txheej tsis sib haum xeeb lossis hloov mus rau qhov chaw, intonationally calm, suab ntsiag to, nrog kev hais lus nrawm, nrog kev txwv qhib-deflecting gestures (tus yam ntxwv shrugging ntawm lub xub pwg nyom thiab caj npab), haum rau kev xav txog kev hais lus phem los ntawm tib neeg, cov lus tsis txaus ntseeg, kev khiav tawm ntawm kev tswj hwm, thiab lwm yam. Haum rau kev ua haujlwm nrog menyuam yaus.

Yuav kom cuam tshuam rau ib tug neeg, thiab ib tug me nyuam nyob rau hauv particular, koj yuav tsum tau tsiv mus nyob raws lub suab scale nyob ntawm seb qhov teeb meem thiab txaus rau nws. Peb hom pob zeb ntawm lub nkoj, hloov peb lub intonation, lub ntsej muag, gestures, vim hais tias peb yuav tsum tau hloov lub "txoj hauj lwm ntawm lub nkoj" = qhov xwm txheej uas tshwm sim. Thaum rocking, lub nkoj yuav tsis ruaj khov, nws yooj yim dua tig nws. Tab sis tsis txhob overdo nws - tsis txhob tig nws, txwv tsis pub lub nkoj - qhov xwm txheej yuav tog.

Yog li, cia peb mus ntxiv. Tus menyuam tsis xav tso cov khoom ua si lossis nws cov khaub ncaws, lossis tus menyuam loj tsis xav ntxuav chav. Peb hais nyob rau hauv lub "Tsev": phooj ywg … / kuv nyob zoo … / Tanyusha, thiab lwm yam., yog hais tias koj zoo hnub no … / sai … / tsis quaj … kev ua haujlwm zoo tau raug teeb tsa) tshem tawm tag nrho cov khoom ua si, tag kis peb yuav mus rau xinesmas, mus rau theatre, mus rau lub pas dej … / tag kis koj yuav tsis mus (piv txwv li) mus rau kindergarten, tab sis koj yuav mus. … (qhov twg?). Lwm yam Koj tuaj yeem ib txwm suav nrog cov ntsiab lus game, incl. luag…

Technique 4 hu ua "Qhov kev ua si". Piv txwv li, peb hais tias: “Los ntawm, Kuv yuav yog hma uas xav noj tag nrho koj cov khoom ua si, tab sis koj yuav tsum muaj sijhawm los nkaum lawv (hauv ib lub thawv, hauv ib lub thawv). Yog li ntawd, cia li los, leej twg mus tom ntej!” Tau kawg, tus hma tsis tas yuav taug kev ntau dhau, tus menyuam yuav tsum kov yeej nws.

Ib zaug kuv tau hais kom muab piv txwv rau cov menyuam yaus … Thov - piv txwv ntawm "Kev Ua Si": "Ilya, cia peb sib tw rau khoom plig - yog tias koj tshem cov khoom ua si sai dua kuv tev 5 qos yaj ywm, ces kuv mam li yuav koj. ice cream … / game koj nug … / peb mus rau xinesmas hnub Sunday … "thiab li ntawd. lwm. Nws paub meej tias leej twg yuav tsum yeej ntawm no?.. Txwv tsis pub, cov txheej txheem no yuav tsis ua haujlwm rau koj ntxiv lawm.

Peb rov qab mus rau txoj kev "Bargaining". Nyob rau hauv qhov tsis zoo version, nws yuav suab: " Dais cub / Kolyunya, thiab lwm yam., yog tias koj tsis tshem cov khoom ua si, tag kis peb yuav tsis tau mus rau lub pas dej ua ke … twb xav pw … / tam sim no txiv yuav los mas nws yeej yuav tsis nyiam…” (1-2 qhov kev sib cav ntxiv tuaj yeem ntxiv - Kuv hu cov txheej txheem no "Nut, txiv ntseej, xauv txiv ntoo"). Koj tuaj yeem ib txwm suav nrog cov ntsiab lus game, incl. ua yeeb yam.

Yog hais tias lub intonation muaj zog, thiab "nce" ntawm lub suab teev los ntawm "ntoo" mus rau "Lub Ntiaj Teb", mus txog rau nws cov qib siab, thiab me ntsis hloov cov lus, ces "Bargaining" yuav tig mus rau. txais tos 5 "Ultimatum": "Kolya, sai sai tshem tag nrho cov khoom ua si, txwv tsis pub peb yuav tsis mus rau lub pas dej tag kis!" Thiab qhov no kuj yuav tsim nyog rau qhov xwm txheej, piv txwv li, yog tias tus menyuam tsis teb rau cov suab nrov.

Tsiv 6 "Rationalize" zoo heev, txhawb kom ib tug me me los yog hluas xav. Nws tuaj yeem muaj ntau hom lus. Cov txheej txheem tuaj yeem ua suab, ob qho tib si hauv cov lus nug, thiab hauv daim ntawv ntawm cov lus nug ib nrab, uas tau thov kom nkag siab. Piv txwv li, "Kolya, koj puas xav tias cov khoom ua si sov rau hauv pem teb? Lawv yuav khov. Koj yuav tsum muab lawv tso rau hauv tsev (lub thawv)”(koj tuaj yeem suav nrog cov ntsiab lus ntawm qhov kev ua si, suav nrog kev ua si hauv lub luag haujlwm).

Los yog, piv txwv li, xws li "kev huv" rationalization: "Kolya, koj yuav tsum ntxuav koj cov khoom ua si hnub no … / ntxuav koj chav, vim tag kis peb mus rau tom hav zoov mus txog rau thaum yav tsaus ntuj, thiab tag kis yuav tsis muaj sij hawm. … Peb yuav tuaj txog hauv kev ntxhov siab … Thiab thaum sawv ntxov koj mus rau kindergarten / tsev kawm ntawv ces … ". Tsis tas yuav tsum ua ntau yam kev txawj ntse, nws tsim nyog rau cov menyuam yaus (piv txwv li, txij li 6-7 xyoos). Nws yog qhov zoo dua rau cov menyuam yaus ntxiv cov ntsiab lus ntawm "Bargaining", "Ultimatum" (koj yuav tsis mus tom hav zoov, koj yuav nyob hauv tsev ib leeg), "Games".

Los yog ib qho kev xaiv tseem ceeb tshaj: "Kolya, koj xav li cas, vim li cas nws thiaj zoo dua tso cov khoom ua si rau hauv lub thawv? Vim li cas ho tsis yuav lawv pw hauv pem teb?..”. Thiab thaum tus me nyuam muab ib qho laj thawj, nws zoo dua los nug: "Dab tsi ntxiv? …Dab tsi ntxiv?” - nyob rau hauv txoj kev no koj yuav txhim kho kev xav ntawm tus neeg me. Koj tuaj yeem hais qhia koj tus kheej tom qab 2-3 cov lus teb ntawm tus menyuam rau lwm tus, yog tias nws pom nws nyuaj. Koj puas xav tias yog vim li cas?

Kuv sim muab qhov xwm txheej zoo ib yam rau koj (nrog cov khoom ua si) los qhia kev sib txawv ntawm kev cuam tshuam rau tib lub sijhawm.

Thiab muaj tib txoj kev cuam tshuam, haum rau cov xwm txheej sib txawv.. Thiab muaj ntau txoj kev cuam tshuam rau cov xwm txheej sib txawv.… Thiab ntau yam tshwm sim … Thiab cov no yog lub hauv paus ntawm kev xav thiab ntau lub zeem muag ntawm lub ntiaj teb, thiab, thaum kawg, lub rudiments ntawm logic. Cov neeg laus kuj yuav tsum muaj peev xwm xav ua ntej.

Thiab tom qab ntawd lwm tus qhia kuv (tom qab kab lus kawg) - nws puas tuaj yeem siv qee qhov piv txwv los qhia cov kev ua ntawm cov tswv yim "Ua li kuv ua" lossis "Hloov kev mloog", thiab tsis yog yuav qhia tus menyuam li cas los sau ntawv. thaum nws quaj?.. luag ntxhi, paub tias qhov no tus neeg laus nws tus kheej yuav tsum tau tsim kev xav, vim nws yog me ntsis ib kab ntawm no. Muaj ntau pua txhiab tus xwm txheej sib txawv, thiab koj tsis tuaj yeem piav qhia txhua tus ntawm lawv - thiab koj yuav tsum tuaj yeem pom cov kev sib piv hauv kev siv cov tswv yim sib txawv.

Txawm li cas los xij, kuv yuav muab ob peb yam piv txwv ntxiv ntawm kev loj hlob ntawm kev xav hauv tus menyuam hnub nyoog 5-7 xyoo.

Qhov teeb meem yog hais txog tsheb. Peb muab teeb meem rau nws los ntawm kos rau ntawm daim ntawv. Muaj 2 txoj kev uas coj los ntawm peb lub nroog mus rau lub zos (los yog vice versa) - ib qho yog txoj kab ncaj nraim, thiab lwm qhov yog txoj kab nkhaus, mus rau hauv txoj kev. Thiab tam sim no 2 lub tsheb tawm ntawm lub nroog mus rau lub zos, ib qho ntawm txoj kev ncaj, ib qho ntawm txoj kev nkhaus. Lub tsheb twg yuav tuaj tom ntej? Ua cas? Vim li cas qhov no tuaj yeem tshwm sim, vim li cas thiaj tuaj yeem ua tau?.. Yog tus menyuam hu, peb nug: "Ntau?.. Ntau?". Koj tuaj yeem teeb tsa cov xwm txheej uas ib lub tsheb yog lub tsheb thauj khoom, thiab lwm qhov yog lub tsheb neeg caij tsheb … Muaj ntau qhov sib txawv ntawm no. Koj tuaj yeem ua haujlwm li no koj tus kheej. Yog tus me nyuam nrhiav tsis tau ib qho laj thawj, qhia ib lo lus teb (qhov no tseem ceeb). Tom qab daws cov teeb meem, nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb sib npaug los kos yam tsawg kawg yog qee qhov kev txiav txim siab, kom xaus. Tus me nyuam ntse ua nws nrog kev txaus siab rau nws tus kheej, tsuas yog qhia nws.

Qhov teeb meem hais txog lub buoy (buoy) los ntawm cov menyuam yaus txoj kev A. S. Makarenko. Txhawm rau tiv thaiv cov menyuam yaus los ntawm kev ua luam dej deb hauv lub yeej rog, cov kws pab tswv yim muab lub buoy rau hauv dej, tuav nws nrog cov saw hlau nruab nrab rau thauj tog rau nkoj. Cov menyuam yaus tsis nyiam lub buoy, nws txwv lawv txoj kev ywj pheej, tso cai rau cov neeg sab laj saib seb leej twg ua luam dej nyob qhov twg thiab ntsuas qhov tsim nyog. Thiab yog li cov menyuam yaus txiav txim siab tshem tawm lub beacon, uas lawv siv sijhawm 2 teev nrog lub thauj tog rau nkoj, sim rub nws tawm ntawm dej. Tab sis lawv tsis ua tiav - lub thauj tog rau nkoj hnyav. Yuav ua li cas lwm txoj kev no beacon raug tshem tawm?.. Thiab tseem?..

Kuv cov xeeb ntxwv ntsib tej hauj lwm zoo li no. Tab sis ntawm no nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb tsis txhob thuam cov kev txiav txim siab ntawm cov me nyuam. Qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws tsis yog qhov tseeb (hauv kev xav ntawm tus neeg laus) ntawm lawv cov lus teb, tab sis lawv xav li cas, lawv txaus siab xav, muab kev xaiv. Yog tias tsim nyog, koj tuaj yeem piav qhia qee yam lossis muab cov lus qhia rau kev daws teeb meem. Tus me nyuam yuav tsum "yeej" nyob rau hauv txhua rooj plaub.