Vim li cas peb cov me nyuam nyob ntsiag to?

2024 Tus sau: Seth Attwood | [email protected]. Kawg hloov kho: 2023-12-16 16:06

Txoj kev nyiam rau kev loj hlob ntawm cov teeb meem zoo li no tau pom nyob rau 20 xyoo dhau los thoob plaws ntiaj teb. Tab sis yog tias thaum ntxov 70s tsuas yog 4% ntawm cov menyuam yaus muaj cov kab mob zoo li no, niaj hnub no cov menyuam yaus uas muaj tus kabmob no tau nce yuav luag xya npaug. Nrog rau qhov sib txawv no, ib qho ntawm cov kev xav tau tshaj plaws yuav sai sai no yog tus kws kho mob hais lus-defectologist.

Kev hais lus yog qhov tsim nyog rau kev txhim kho tag nrho ntawm tus neeg, vim nws tsis yog ib qho kev sib txuas lus nkaus xwb, tab sis kuj yog ib qho kev xav, kev xav, kev tswj hwm tus cwj pwm, kev paub txog kev xav thiab kev xav ntawm ib tug neeg. Yuav kom nkag siab txog qhov teeb meem, nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb kom paub tias kev hais lus tuaj yeem ua haujlwm thiab ua tsis tau. Kev hais lus nquag yog ncaj qha li tus menyuam hais, i.e. muaj peev xwm hais tau nrov nrov. Passive yog qhia nyob rau hauv daim ntawv ntawm kev to taub lwm tus neeg hais lus, piv txwv li, koj hais kom ib tug me nyuam muab ib lub xov tooj rau koj, thiab nws muab koj lub xov tooj, thiab tsis yog lwm yam uas yog nyob rau hauv nws lub zeem muag. Nws distinguishes ib diav ntawm diav rawg, lub rooj zaum los ntawm cov quav, khoom qab zib los ntawm ib tug cwj mem, tau kawg, yog hais tias koj tus kheej tsis confuse lub npe.

Hauv cov menyuam yaus, kev loj hlob ntawm kev ua haujlwm thiab kev hais lus tsis zoo tsis tshwm sim ib txhij. Nws ntseeg tias tus menyuam thawj zaug kawm to taub lwm tus hais lus, tsuas yog mloog lwm tus, thiab tom qab ntawd pib hais nws tus kheej. Ntawd yog, nws txoj kev hais lus tsis txaus ntseeg ua ntej. Txawm li cas los xij, nws yuav tsum nco ntsoov tias txij li thawj lub lim tiam ntawm lub neej, tus me nyuam paub txog cov yam ntxwv ntawm leej niam cov lus thiab twb nyob rau lub sijhawm no kawm hais lus zoo. Yog li ntawd, nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb uas yuav tau pib tham nrog koj tus menyuam sai li sai tau. Paradoxically, ntau tus niam txiv tsis xav txog qhov yuav tsum tau tham nrog cov menyuam yaus yam tsis tau pom ib tus neeg hauv lawv thiab xav tias, lawv hais tias, lawv tseem tsis nkag siab dab tsi, yog li vim li cas thab huab cua txhua.

Cia peb sim xyuas seb yog vim li cas thiaj li qeeb ntawm kev hais lus, thiab yog vim li cas peb cov me nyuam tawv ncauj "tsis kam" tham nrog peb.

Ib tug me nyuam muaj peb xyoos nyob ntawm qhov chaw txais tos. Nkag mus rau hauv qhov chaw ua haujlwm, nws ya hla kuv mus rau qhov kev taw qhia ntawm cov khoom ua si ci, tsis txawm nres ntawm kuv. Zoo li tsis muaj leej twg tab sis nws nyob hauv qhov chaw ua haujlwm. Thaum tus menyuam tsis khoom nrog cov khoom ua si, nws tsis teb cov lus nug, tsis hnov mob rau stimuli, thiab txawm tias leej niam tsis tuaj yeem nyiam nws nrog txhua yam. Tab sis tus me nyuam tau dhuav nrog cov khoom ua si, thiab nws, tig nws ntsia nws niam, hais tias: "A-aa". Niam muab ib lub raj mis compote tawm ntawm nws lub hnab thiab muab rau tus tub. Nws txaus siab. Tsuas yog nws tus kheej paub qhov no "ah-aa" txhais li cas, tab sis los ntawm cov tshuaj tiv thaiv nws yog qhov tseeb tias nws "xav". Thaum lub sij hawm tag nrho lub rooj sib tham, muaj ob peb lub ntsiab lus ntxiv, uas leej niam reacts tam sim ntawd, zoo li ib tug khawv koob, noj zaub mov, khoom ua si thiab lwm yam khoom nthuav rau tus me nyuam tawm ntawm lub hnab. Tsis ntev tus me nyuam tau dhuav nrog tag nrho cov manipulations, thiab nws kos rau ntawm lub twb kos-tawm nrov nrov "A-aaaa!" Niam reacts rau lub teeb liab no los ntawm kev tshem cov ntsiav tshuaj ntawm lub plab hnyuv ntawm lub hnab. Txij thaum ntawd los, tus me nyuam calms down, thiab tsis muaj dab tsi ua tau los cuam tshuam nws txoj kev xav ntawm cov khoom siv ntxim nyiam. Qhov no tsis yog ib qho piv txwv tshwj xeeb, qhov no yog ib qho xwm txheej.

Muaj ntau yam laj thawj rau kev hais lus tsis zoo, thiab kev txhim kho kev hais lus qeeb feem ntau yog tshwm sim los ntawm tag nrho cov teeb meem ntau dua lossis tsawg dua. Tab sis nws tseem ceeb dua kom pom qee qhov tsis sib xws hauv cov theem ua ntej, thiab tom qab ntawd muaj ntau yam teeb meem tuaj yeem zam tau.

Thawj qhov kuv pom zoo yog sim koj tus menyuam qhov hnov lus. Nyob rau hauv txoj cai, rau txhua yam teeb meem nrog kev hais lus, mus ntsib kws kho mob otolaryngologist yuav tsis yog superfluous. Kuv paub txog ib rooj plaub thaum pom tus menyuam tsis hnov lus tsis zoo thaum nws mus kawm ntawv. Ua ntej ntawd, ib tug me nyuam tub uas muaj peev xwm tau kawm nyeem daim di ncauj. Qhov teeb meem tau pom tseeb thaum kev sib tham ntawm cov neeg txawv teb chaws tham nrog nws tau txawv heev ntawm kev hais lus ntawm nws cov neeg hlub. Tus kws kho mob otolaryngologist kuj tseem yuav pom lwm qhov teeb meem - luv luv frenum lossis tus nplaig loj heev, uas tuaj yeem ua rau nyuaj rau kev hais lus, vim tias tus menyuam nyiam nyob twj ywm.

Kev ncua ntawm kev hais lus kuj tuaj yeem kuaj pom los ntawm tus kws kho mob hlwb. Yog li koj yuav tsum tsis txhob hla txoj kev npaj mus rau nws nyob rau hauv lub sijhawm pom zoo. Nco ntsoov tias tus neeg hais lus pib tsim los ntawm kev yug me nyuam, thiab ua ntej tus me nyuam hais thawj lo lus, nws hais lus mus rau theem ntawm kev loj hlob xws li humming thiab babbling. Nws yog qhov tsis muaj cov theem no uas tus kws kho mob hlwb tuaj yeem kuaj pom. Muaj cov xwm txheej thaum ncua kev hais lus kev loj hlob "portends" lwm yam kev kuaj mob - xwm txheej ntawm yug, cev xeeb tub, caj ces kab mob, pathological (nce lossis txo) cov leeg nqaij, thiab lwm yam.

Koj yuav tsum paub tias kev hais lus qeeb qeeb yog ib qho ntawm cov cim tseem ceeb ntawm cov menyuam yaus autism. Yog tias tus me nyuam muaj kev lag luam hauv kev hais lus thiab cov tsos mob ntawm qhov tsis muaj kev xav rau kev sib cuag, nws tuaj yeem xav tias tus menyuam no yog autistic. Cov me nyuam zoo li no tsis luag, tsis txhob ua siab ntev rau ntawm qhov pom ntawm lawv niam lawv txiv, feem ntau tsis saib rau hauv lub qhov muag. Tab sis koj tsis muaj cai kuaj tus me nyuam no koj tus kheej. Tsuas yog ib tus kws kho mob uas tsim nyog rau menyuam yaus tuaj yeem kuaj mob autism. Tus kws kho mob hlwb kuj tsis muaj cai rau qhov no, nws tsuas yog xav tau, tab sis rau kev kuaj mob nws yuav xa tus menyuam mus rau tus kws kho mob. Mus lossis tsis mus ntsib kws kho mob hlwb yog qhov tseeb, koj xaiv, tab sis txhawm rau hloov kho tus menyuam mus rau qhov xwm txheej ntawm lub neej tiag tiag, koj yuav tsum hloov koj lub tswv yim txog cov menyuam yaus ntau yam, thiab yog li pom qhov tseeb tag nrho.

Tam sim no hais txog "txhua hnub" yog vim li cas rau ncua sij hawm hais lus.

Cia peb hu thawj tus - "soothing gadget". Tau kawg, thaum lub sijhawm ntawd, thaum tus menyuam muaj cov ntsiav tshuaj lossis xov tooj hauv nws txhais tes, leej niam tswj kev ua noj borscht, ntxuav thiab dai khaub ncaws, pub rau tus tij laug, txiv thiab txawm taug kev tus dev … lub neej ", - tsis yog tsuas yog teeb meem nrog kev hais lus, nws yog uncoordinated, nws tau pronounced outbursts ntawm aggression, muaj teeb meem nrog noj mov, tsaug zog, nws yuav tsis calm down rau ib tug ntev lub sij hawm nrog me ntsis irritation. Nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb kom nkag siab tias lub hlwb ntawm ib tug neeg me me loj hlob nyob rau hauv ib ntu uas muaj kev hloov pauv ntawm ib theem ntawm txoj kev loj hlob mus rau lwm qhov, qhov twg txhua qhov dhau los yog lub hauv paus ntawm cov theem tom ntej lossis theem ntawm kev loj hlob.

Object-manipulative kev ua ub no yog ib qho tseem ceeb thaum lub sij hawm me nyuam mos, ua raws li cov khoom taw qhia. Tus menyuam lub sijhawm no txhim kho los ntawm kev kawm txog cov khoom ntawm lub ntiaj teb nyob ib puag ncig nws. Thiab lub sijhawm no, lub voos xwmfab tiag tiag hauv txhais tes ntawm tus menyuam ncaj qha tsim nws. Nws tuaj yeem nqa hauv nws txhais tes, hauv nws lub qhov ncauj, yaim, pov rau hauv pem teb, khob rau lwm lub voos xwmfab, thiab lwm yam. Tab sis lub voos xwmfab ntawm lub ntsiav tshuaj tshuaj ntsuam tsis muaj cov khoom tsim nyog rau tus menyuam, thiab, ib txwm, tsis tuaj yeem txhawb kev loj hlob ntawm lub hlwb, muab kev nkag siab ntawm cov khoom thiab cov khoom zoo. Tom qab tag nrho, cov khoom ntawm tag nrho cov khoom virtual yog tib yam - lub tiaj tus, du screen! Thiab kev khav theeb uas cov niam txiv khav theeb rau ib leeg txog qhov ua tau zoo npaum li cas lawv tus menyuam tuav lub ntsiav tshuaj yog cov lus tsis tseeb kiag li. Yog li ntawd, txoj cai thib ib: mus txog peb xyoos - tsis muaj gadgets! Kev ua si hauv khoos phis tawj tuaj yeem nkag mus rau hauv tus menyuam cov kev ua ub no tsuas yog tom qab nws tau paub txog cov kev ua ub no ntawm cov menyuam yaus - kev kos duab, kev tsim kho, kev nkag siab thiab kev piav qhia. Thaum tus me nyuam kawm los ntawm nws tus kheej ua si zoo tib yam rau cov menyuam yaus cov kev ua si - kev ua si, kev ua haujlwm, lub cev muaj zog, kev xav.

Kev txhim kho cov txuj ci zoo ntawm lub cev muaj zog yog kev sib tham sib cais. Ntau tus twb paub lawm hais tias kev txhim kho cov kev txawj zoo ntawm lub cev muaj zog ua rau muaj txiaj ntsig zoo rau kev loj hlob ntawm kev hais lus, thiab cov niam txiv uas muaj kev mob siab rau ua rau cov menyuam mos ua haujlwm nrog lawv cov ntiv tes. Tseeb tiag, tib neeg lub hlwb yog tsim los ntawm txoj hauv kev uas, hauv cov ntsiab lus yooj yim, thaj chaw ntawm lub hlwb lub luag haujlwm rau kev hais lus thiab kev txawj tsav tsheb zoo tau txuas nrog, thiab los ntawm kev tsim ib cheeb tsam, peb txhawb kev loj hlob ntawm lwm tus. Qhov no, los ntawm txoj kev, feem ntau yog siv rau cov neeg laus uas muaj mob hlwb (strokes). Thaum lub sij hawm rehabilitation txheej txheem, lawv raug qhia kom knit, embroider, sculpt, thiab lwm yam. Tab sis kev txawj tsav tsheb zoo tsis tuaj yeem tsim kho yam tsis muaj kev loj hlob, thiab qhov no yog tus menyuam lub peev xwm txav tau zoo thiab sib koom ua ke. Piv txwv li, pov thiab ntes ib lub pob, dhia, txav koj txhais tes mus rau hauv sync, taug kev nce ntaiv thiab ntawm "ncab" (cov menyuam yaus nyiam qhov no heev!). Qee zaum kev tawm dag zog yooj yim rau kev sib koom tes ntawm kev txav - sculpting, kos duab nrog xaum, khawm, lacing - tuaj yeem txhawb kev loj hlob ntawm kev hais lus. Nws tseem yog ib qho tseem ceeb kom nkag siab txog cov txheej txheem rov qab: yog tias cov chaw hais lus thiab lub cev muaj zog txuas nrog, ces kev ntaus tus menyuam txhais tes yog txwv tsis pub! Cia peb nco qab txog zaj yeeb yaj kiab uas tau yeej Oscar "Tus Vaj Ntxwv Speech", qhov twg King George VI ntawm Askiv tab tom ntsib teeb meem loj los ntawm kev hais lus thaum yau: nws txiv tuav nws txhais tes, rov qhia sau ntawv nrog nws sab tes xis, vim tias yav tom ntej huab tais. yog sab laug.

Feem ntau, kev loj hlob ntawm kev hais lus, oddly txaus, yog hampered los ntawm ob hom lus ib puag ncig. Cov tsev neeg coob coob nyob hauv lub ntiaj teb niaj hnub no yog tsim los ntawm cov neeg ntawm cov kab lis kev cai sib txawv thiab muaj ob hom lus lossis ntau hom lus. Cov menyuam yaus nyob hauv tsev neeg ntau hom lus muaj qhov tshwj xeeb hauv kev loj hlob ntawm kev hais lus. Tab sis ib txwm muaj kev loj hlob ntawm kev hais lus ob hom lus yuav raug tsim yog tias tus me nyuam hnov cov lus no tas li, thiab yog tias nws tsis muaj kev puas hlwb.

Nws ntseeg tau hais tias cov menyuam yaus uas muaj ntau hom lus paub qhov kev hais lus ntawm kev hais lus qeeb dua thiab pom cov suab sib txuas hauv cov lus qeeb dua. Tab sis, ua ntej, ntau nyob ntawm lub peculiarities ntawm cov lus lawv tus kheej: cov lus uas zoo sib xws nyob rau hauv grammatical tsim thiab hais lus yog mastered yooj yim dua thiab sai dua tag nrho cov sib txawv (txawm li cas los xij, zoo li cov neeg laus). Qhov ntau dua qhov sib txawv ntawm cov lus ntawm tib lo lus hauv cov lus ntawm leej niam thiab leej txiv, qhov nyuaj dua nws yog tus tswv. Tus me nyuam yuav tsum kawm tsis tau tsuas yog lub npe hais lus ntawm tej yam khoom, tab sis kuj yuav correlated lawv nyob rau hauv ib tug thiab lwm yam lus ntawm lawv tus kheej. Tus txheej txheem ntawm kev txawj hais lus yuav ua tau me ntsis ntxiv nyob rau hauv lub sij hawm, txij li thaum lub ntim ntawm assimilation ntawm cov ntaub ntawv yog nce ob mus rau peb lub sij hawm (raws li tus naj npawb ntawm cov lus), tab sis qhov no tsis cuam tshuam rau kev loj hlob ntawm lub hlwb thiab lub cev muaj zog nyob rau hauv txhua txoj kev.. Tab sis ntawm no qhov xwm txheej ntawm qhov muaj ib puag ncig kev hais lus yog qhov tseem ceeb - txhua tus niam txiv yuav tsum hais lus nrog tus menyuam hauv nws hom lus thiab tsis qiv cov lus los ntawm lwm hom lus. Cias muab, tus menyuam yuav tsum hnov cov lus hais los ntawm cov niam txiv, thiab tsis yog surzhik, tus me nyuam yuav tsum tau "kho" yog tias, hais lus hauv ib hom lus, nws siv cov lus los ntawm lwm tus. Cov lus xaus hauv qhov no yog nyob ntawm koj.

Thiab nyob rau hauv txoj kev xav tsis thoob tshaj, kev hais lus qeeb yog tshwm sim hauv cov menyuam yaus ntawm cov niam uas saib xyuas mob siab. Cov niam zoo li no, ua cov neeg txawj ntse heev, tsuas yog tsis muab sijhawm rau tus menyuam hais lus. Lawv ntes tus menyuam lub siab nyiam los ntawm kev txav ntawm nws txhais tes, tsa qhov muag muag lossis qhov sib txawv ntawm cov ces kaum ntawm daim di ncauj. Thiab tus me nyuam zoo li no tsis tas yuav hais lus! Nws nkag siab tsis yog nrog ib nrab lo lus, tab sis nrog ib nrab tsab ntawv! Anecdote qhia txog qhov xwm txheej kom raug:

Ib tsev neeg muaj ib tug tub xwb tsis hais dab tsi. Tus tub hluas raug rub mus rau ntau tus kws tshaj lij thiab cov kws kho hais lus, tab sis lawv tsuas yog shrugged thiab ua tsis tau dab tsi. Sij hawm dhau mus, tus tub hluas muaj xya xyoo. Ib tag kis sawv ntxov, thaum tag nrho tsev neeg tab tom noj tshais, nws mam li nco dheev hais meej thiab txawv: "Vim li cas porridge oversalted?" Cov niam txiv khiav mus ncig, fidgeted, nug: "Vim li cas koj tsis hais ua ntej?", Thiab nws teb lawv: "Yog li txhua yam zoo ua ntej!"

Kev hais lus yog ib qho haujlwm uas muaj nws tus qauv. Thiab ntawm thawj theem, YUAV TSUM hais lus yog qhov tseem ceeb. Thiab nws yuav tsis tshwm sim yog hais tias leej niam, ntawm tus taw tes ntawm tus me nyuam thawj zaug, muab qhov nws xav tau thiab ua hauj lwm raws li "tus neeg txhais lus" rau tag nrho lub ntiaj teb no. Qhov xwm txheej no yooj yim heev rau tus menyuam, thiab tus menyuam nws tus kheej tsis zoo li xav kom tshem tawm qhov kev nplij siab no, nws yuav tsum tau coj los ntawm qhov ntawd los ntawm kev hais lus los ntawm niam txiv. Tus me nyuam yuav tsum paub tias nws xav tau kev hais lus, yog tias tsis muaj nws nws yuav tsis tau qhov nws xav tau.

Xav txog tag nrho cov saum toj no, koj yuav tsum to taub tias txawm qhov teeb meem pib ntawm kev hais lus qeeb, qhov laj thawj tseem ceeb yog vim li cas cov niam txiv lawv tus kheej tsis xav txog qhov yuav tsum tau tham ntau nrog lawv tus menyuam. Tsis hnov cov neeg laus hais lus txaus, tsis pom kev hais lus thiab tsis tuaj yeem ua raws li nws, tus menyuam yuav poob qab hauv kev hais lus. Peb yuav tsum tsis txhob hnov qab tias kev hais lus thiab kev loj hlob ntawm lub hlwb muaj kev sib raug zoo, thiab kev hais lus uas tsis tsim nyob rau lub sijhawm tuaj yeem ua rau muaj kev lag luam hauv kev loj hlob ntawm lub hlwb. Rau txoj kev loj hlob ntawm tus me nyuam txoj kev hais lus, ua ntej ntawm tag nrho cov, nws yog ib qhov tsim nyog los tsim tej yam kev mob. Qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws yog tham nrog koj tus menyuam kom ntau li ntau tau. Nws yuav tsum niaj hnub hnov cov lus hais rau nws, thiab tsis yog los ntawm TV screen. Txhawm rau ua qhov no, koj yuav tsum tau hais tawm txhua hnub txhua hnub thiab cov xwm txheej hauv tus menyuam lub neej. Piv txwv li, npaj mus rau kindergarten, tu lub txaj, taug kev, noj mov. Nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb uas yuav tau piav qhia txhua yam uas koj pom nrog koj tus menyuam, txhua yam uas koj ua, thiab txhua yam uas koj xav tau, hu txhua yam hauv cov lus yooj yooj yim, sim tsis txhob siv cov lus ntev thiab nyuaj. Kev nyeem ntawv thiab cim cov paj huam, suav cov txee, uas tuaj yeem ua nrog cov yeeb yam uas qhia txog qhov tseem ceeb ntawm qhov tshwm sim, pab txhim kho kev hais lus.

Peb cov me nyuam loj hlob nyob rau hauv cov xwm txheej tshiab ntawm tag nrho cov hauj lwm ntawm cov niam txiv, thiab, hmoov tsis, lawv cov teeb meem yog cov khoom ntawm lub neej tshiab rau cov neeg laus, lawv impetuous lub neej thiab tsis muaj sij hawm. Tab sis nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb kom nkag siab tias koj yuav tsis muaj peev xwm hnov mob zoo li tus noog nyob hauv qhov xwm txheej no, thiab kev cia siab tias txhua yam yuav daws tau nws tus kheej, thiab tus menyuam "dam ntawd" yuav hais lus, me dhau, txawm tias muaj kev lees paub ntawm cov pog..

Ekaterina Goltsberg

Hais txog lub hwj chim khawv koob uas niam hais rau nws tus me nyuam

Thaum peb nyuam qhuav pib sib ntaus rau peb tus tub hlob, ib tus kws kho mob hlwb - sib nrug los ntawm txhua yam txawv txawv thiab tsis muaj txiaj ntsig - ua khoom plig loj rau peb. Nws tham txog qhov kev sim uas tau ua nyob rau hauv ib qho chaw hauv tebchaws Askiv (Kuv tuaj yeem yuam kev, vim txhua yam yog raws li nws cov lus).

Cov niam txiv ntawm cov me nyuam mob ua ib qho kev cai yooj yim txhua hmo. Tom qab tus me nyuam tsaug zog lawm, lawv tos rau lub active theem ntawm kev pw tsaug zog - qhov no yog hais txog kaum tsib feeb tom qab. Thiab ces lawv hais cov lus yooj yooj yim rau tus me nyuam:

Kuv hlub koj. Kuv zoo siab rau koj. Kuv zoo siab heev uas koj yog kuv tus tub. Koj yog tus tub zoo tshaj rau kuv.”

Cov ntawv nyeem yog ib yam zoo li no - tib yam rau txhua tus.

Thiab lawv tau muab cov menyuam no piv nrog lwm tus - nrog cov kev kuaj mob zoo sib xws, tab sis cov niam txiv tsis ntxhi dab tsi rau lawv hmo ntuj. Cov menyuam mos uas tau txais lawv niam cov lus tshaj tawm hmo ntuj txog kev hlub tau rov zoo sai dua. Qhov ntawd yog yam niam txiv ua khawv koob.

Peb pib siv nws yuav luag tam sim ntawd. Ntau yooj yim dua - tsis zoo li feem ntau cov kev kho mob, nws yog dawb, ib txwm ntawm tes. Thaum xub thawj kuv hais tias yuav tsum tau ua dab tsi los ntawm tsab ntawv. Ces nws pib improvise. Tsib xyoos dhau los, thiab kuv tseem ntxhi lus sib txawv rau kuv cov tub. Rau txhua tus ntawm lawv thiab yuav luag txhua hmo.

Nws nyuaj rau kuv tham txog cov txiaj ntsig tshwj xeeb, tab sis Dani tsis muaj autism lawm. Thiab kuv paub tseeb tias kuv cov lus ntxhi ua lub luag haujlwm. Tab sis tseem, muaj ib yam dab tsi uas nws muab rau kuv thiab cov me nyuam. Qhov no yog qhov tseem ceeb kom nkag siab - khawv koob ua haujlwm ob txoj hauv kev! Ob niam txiv thiab menyuam tau txais ib qho tseem ceeb heev. Txhua tus muaj lawv tus kheej "Ib yam tseem ceeb".

Nws ua li cas?

Zoo siab nrog txhua tus me nyuam. Qhov no yog ib qho kev xav incomparable. Txawm lawv laus npaum li cas los, thaum lub sij hawm pw tsaug zog lawv zoo li me me tub txib saum ntuj. Thaum nruab hnub, nws tsis yooj yim los puag lossis tuav hauv koj txhais tes - lawv twb muaj ntau yam ua! Thiab thaum hmo ntuj kuv puag lawv txhua tus, tham txog qhov tseem ceeb rau peb ob leeg. Thiab kuv xav tias peb txoj kev sib raug zoo loj tuaj thiab muaj zog npaum li cas.

Lub sijhawm tus kheej rau txhua tus. Nyob rau hauv cov kwj ntawm hnub, kuv tsis tuaj yeem siv sijhawm tus kheej rau txhua tus. Ntau zaus tshaj tsis, peb txhua tus ua ke, ua ib pab neeg. Peb ua si, sib txuas lus, noj - tag nrho ua ke. Tab sis lub sijhawm no, txhua tus ntawm lawv yog qhov tshwj xeeb. Vim kuv hais lus txawv rau sawv daws. Raws li qhov tam sim no koj xav tau thiab yuav tsum tau qhia rau tus menyuam tshwj xeeb no.

Kuv tuaj yeem hais qee yam tseem ceeb uas yuav tsis hnov thaum nruab hnub. Cov hnub txawv. Qee zaum los ntawm ntau cov ntaub ntawv lossis khoom qab zib, cov menyuam mos yuav coj tus cwj pwm tsis zoo, thiab qhov no ua rau peb cov kev sib txuas lus nyuaj. Tab sis thaum kuv ntxhi rau hauv lawv lub pob ntseg hmo ntuj hais tias kuv hlub lawv npaum li cas, tag nrho cov no tseem nyob rau hauv yav dhau los. Kev sib cav, kev nkag siab yuam kev, kev chim siab.

Tus me nyuam hnov kev hlub. Ib zaug kuv nyeem hais tias ib tug me nyuam yuav tsum nquag hais ib nqe lus zoo li no: "Koj puas paub tias yog peb xaiv tau, ces tawm ntawm tag nrho cov me nyuam hauv ntiaj teb no peb yuav xaiv koj." Thaum kuv xub hais qhov no rau Matvey, nws zoo siab thiab xav tsis thoob tib lub sijhawm. Nws taug kev ncig thiab rov hais dua: "Dab tsi, tiag tiag kuv ???". Yog li kuv pom tau hais tias nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb heev rau cov me nyuam xav tias lawv yog cov tshwj xeeb, lawv tseem ceeb thiab xav tau, ib yam li lawv yog. Tam sim no lo lus no nrog rau "Kuv puas tau qhia koj hnub no tias kuv hlub koj?" ruaj khov rau hauv peb lub neej. Ntxiv mus, Matvey - txij li thaum nws yog tus neeg hais lus tshaj plaws txog tam sim no - ib txwm hais hauv cov lus teb tias nws yuav xaiv peb ua niam txiv thiab yuav xaiv nws cov kwv tij.

Kuv niaj hnub hais cov lus tseem ceeb, Hauv kev kho constellation muaj xws li "cov lus tso cai" - kab lus uas peb hais thaum lub hnub qub, thiab lawv hloov tus cwj pwm ntawm tib neeg, kho lawv tus ntsuj plig. Cov lus feem ntau yooj yim - txog kev hlub, kev lees paub, kev khuv xim. Yog li kuv pom tias yog tias koj hais cov lus tseem ceeb rau koj cov menyuam thaum hmo ntuj, ntau yam teeb meem raug daws los ntawm lawv tus kheej. Piv txwv li, nrog rau hierarchy hauv tsev neeg. Cov kab lus dab tsi yog thiab qhov kuv feem ntau hais:

• "Kuv yog koj niam, thiab koj yog kuv tus tub" - kab lus no yuav pab tau yog tias koj tsis xav tias muaj kev sib txuas nrog tus menyuam, uas yog kev sib txuas ntawm sab ntsuj plig. Thiab kuj yog tias koj muaj lub hierarchy tawg - thiab nws tsis paub meej tias leej twg yog leej twg leej niam.

• "Kuv loj thiab koj me" - cov kab lus no yog dua hais txog lub hierarchy. Thiab ib qho ntxiv, nws pab kom loj hlob hauv kev sib raug zoo nrog cov menyuam yaus. Cov menyuam yaus so thaum niam thaum kawg ua ib tug neeg laus.

• "Kuv muab, thiab koj muab" - qhov no yog dua hais txog lub hierarchy, hais txog kev khiav ntawm lub zog. Nws pab yog tias leej niam sim "tso tawm" lub zog ntawm cov menyuam yaus.

• "Koj yog tus tub zoo tshaj rau kuv." Ntawm no koj tuaj yeem ntxiv lwm qhov kev txiav txim ntawm tus menyuam. Tom qab tag nrho, kuv, piv txwv li, tsis muaj ib tug tub, tab sis peb. Thiab txhua tus ntawm lawv yog qhov zoo hauv nws qhov chaw.

• "Koj yog tus tub uas peb xav tau." Qhov no yuav pab tus menyuam kom paub tias nws muaj nqis, nws "kev zoo". Kuv tshwj xeeb tshaj yog pom zoo cov kab lus rau cov uas pheej sib piv lawv cov menyuam nrog lwm tus - tsis yog nyob rau hauv nws lub siab nyiam.

• "Koj tsis tas yuav ua dab tsi rau kuv, Kuv hlub koj rau qhov koj yog." Ntau tus yuav npau taws. Tab sis cov lus tsis yog hais txog tsis ntxuav tais diav. Tab sis qhov uas rau kuv lub hom phiaj koj yuav tsum tsis txhob nqa cov generic dynamics.

• "Kuv zoo siab heev uas koj nyob." Nws tshwj xeeb yog pab cov neeg uas tus menyuam tsis xav tau.

• "Kuv zoo siab koj yog ib tug me nyuam tub." Piv txwv li, yog tias koj xav tau ib tug ntxhais thiab tsis tuaj yeem lees txais koj tus menyuam lub sijhawm ntev.

• "Txiv thiab kuv hlub koj heev, koj yog peb tus tub" - lo lus tseem ceeb ntawm no yog "peb". Nws pab yog tias koj muaj kev nyiam rau cov menyuam yaus rub, rub thiab qhia.

• "Koj yeej ib yam li koj txiv", "Koj txiv yog txiv zoo tshaj rau koj", "Kuv cia koj hlub txiv thiab coj nws los ntawm nws" - yog koj muaj teeb meem nrog tus me nyuam txiv, yog nws tsis tsa tus me nyuam los yog koj nyob rau hauv kev sib cav … Tab sis txawm rau cov niam txiv uas nyob ua ke, cov kab lus yuav pab tau. Yog leej niam tsis kam lees tus txiv thiab tsis pub nws koom nrog tus menyuam.

• "Kuv thov txim tiag". Cov kab lus no tsim nyog yog tias thaum nruab hnub koj muaj kev sib ntaus, tsis muaj kev nkag siab, rau txim, tawg. Tsis txhob thov kev zam txim - nws tawg lub hierarchy. Tab sis nws tsim nyog thov txim thiab hais tias koj thov txim ntau.

• "Kuv zoo siab rau koj". Nws yog qhov tshwj xeeb tshaj yog pab tau thaum koj tab tom sim ua kom tus menyuam tawm ntawm qhov nws tsis yog - thiab leej twg tej zaum yuav tsis yog. Nws kuj pab rau cov menyuam yaus uas txawv ntawm lwm tus - piv txwv.

• "Kuv hlub koj". Peb lo lus khawv koob los ntawm txhua yam. Yog tias qhov kev xav no tau muab tso rau hauv lawv. Qhov ntawd yog, yog tias koj tsis tuaj yeem hais qee lub suab thiab cov ntawv, tab sis ua pa tawm kev tshaj tawm ntawm kev hlub tag nrho koj lub siab.

Yuav xaiv cov kab lus li cas?

Koj tuaj yeem ua tau thiab yuav tsum sim sib txawv. Thiab koj yuav nkag siab qhov twg yog qhov tseem ceeb thiab tsim nyog rau koj thiab koj tus menyuam tam sim no. Piv txwv li, ntawm kuv tus kheej kuv pom tias tom qab cov kab lus, uas yog ib qho tseem ceeb heev rau kuv niaj hnub no, ib tug tob exhalation tshwm sim - los ntawm nws tus kheej -. Ib yam dab tsi so hauv.

Nws zoo ib yam nrog tus menyuam. Thaum nws tseem ceeb heev rau nws hnov ib yam dab tsi tam sim no, piv txwv li, tias koj txaus siab rau nws, nws exhales thiab so. Tsuas yog saib. Qee lub sij hawm tej yam tshwm sim tsis pom tam sim ntawd, qee zaum lawv tsis kaj li. Tab sis feem ntau muaj ib qho kev ntsuas - qee yam kev so.

Koj yuav tsum tau mloog mus rau pronouncing khawv koob kab lus. Koj ua tsis tau, raws li kuv hais, ua nws mechanically. Nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb uas yuav tau mus cuag tus txheej txheem nrog ib tug ntsuj plig, thiab tsis nyob rau hauv lub khiav. Zoo li, tam sim no kuv yuav rov hais dua rau peb feeb ntawm ib daim ntawv, thiab txhua yam yuav zoo. Txoj haujlwm nyuaj tshaj plaws tshwm sim hauv. Rau cov lus yuav ua tej yam yees siv, lawv yuav tsum tau them cov khawv koob no. Thiab tus nqi uas peb cov menyuam xav tau yog nyob hauv peb lub siab.

Qee zaum, txhawm rau hais cov lus yooj yooj yim, koj yuav tsum xub hais qee yam zoo ib yam li koj niam koj txiv (hauv koj lub siab). Kuv paub cov ntxhais uas, thaum thawj zaug, quaj dhau tus menyuam tsaug zog. Los ntawm kuv tus kheej mob thaum yau. Tab sis khawv koob yog khawv koob vim nws kho. Nrog rau peb niam lub siab.

Kev sib kho yuav tsum tsis txhob ntev. Nws tsuas yog peb mus rau tsib feeb xwb. Tab sis kev xav mob siab heev tsib feeb. Nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb uas yuav tau ua qhov no tsis tu ncua thiab me ntsis. Hauv cov kauj ruam me. Es tsis txhob sim ntxhi peb teev kev hlub ib zaug ib lub lim tiam. Peb noj ob peb zaug txhua hnub, thiab peb tsis tsuas yog ua hnub Sunday xwb, puas yog?

Thiab ib qho ntxiv, tsis txhob hnov qab hais cov nqe lus no thaum nruab hnub, nruab nrab ntawm lub sijhawm, tsis muaj laj thawj. puag lawv ib yam li ntawd yog koj taug kev. Smack lub nraub qaum ntawm lub taub hau, uas yog zaum ntawm ib sab. Nov yog ib yam uas me nyuam yuav nco ntsoov mus ib sim neej. Thiab feem ntau yuav, qhov no yog qhov lawv yuav nco qab.

Tsis txhob kwv yees lub hwj chim ntawm leej niam cov lus. Yuav kom lees paub qhov no, nco ntsoov cov lus ntawm koj niam koj puas nco qab tam sim no, peb caug, plaub caug xyoo tom qab. Thiab qhov twg yog qhov tseem ceeb rau koj.

Cov khawv koob no ib txwm muaj rau koj, tsis raug nqi nyiaj, koj tsis xav tau dab tsi tshwj xeeb rau qhov no. Tsuas yog tos koj tus menyuam hnia qab zib - thiab ntxhi ib yam tseem ceeb hauv nws pob ntseg.

"Kuv hlub koj. Kuv zoo siab rau koj. Koj yog tus tub zoo tshaj rau kuv thiab txiv"

Dab tsi yuav yooj yim dua thiab muaj txiaj ntsig ntau dua li cov lus hais los ntawm lub siab ntawm niam hlub?

Olga Valyaeva